"What a nice morning for exercising!" said Sportacus. He bounced out of bed and went by his daily routine of stretching and eating fruit. Suddenly he heard an unfamiliar voice. "Who’s there? And what are you doing in my airship!" He shouted at the stranger.
im here to suck your dick
that’s how I wanna go
Okay but if you read the article he wasn’t stabbed
he literally walked into the blade thinking it was a toy and not that it was a replica actual sword
HE LITERALLY WALKED INTO MY SWORD OFFICER
"And he just walked right into the point. I don’t know if he thought it was a toy."
and a bit later in the article, this gem:
"The ex-husband was taken to hospital following the altercation, but not before he, in true Zelda fashion, smashed a pot (a flower pot, over the head of Thompson)."
This is how Michael and I are going to die.
All I see is Erwin getting ready to punish Levi and I’m not sure whether I’m just excited or aroused
"hold your horses" my friend says, i immediately begin gathering my horses, but theres too many. my horses are everywhere. they’re running. my horses are going, they’re going… they’re gone. i can no longer hold my horses.
when i was 12 i made a deal with my dad that if i didn’t date until i was 16 he’d owe me $100 AND I FUCKING REMEMBERED THE OTHER DAY AND MY DAD SAID IT WAS "RIDICULOUS ENOUGH TO BE TRUE" HE’S ACTUALLY GONNA GIVE ME $100
so my dad come home today and was like “katie i did it i got your money”
he gave me 100 one dollar bills
my dad gave me 100 one dollar bills
i can pretend to be a super star
i am a queen
i made it rain on my mom